Managing Friendships in Uni: Why Some Fade and Others Last

University friendships are a beautiful, chaotic mix of group projects, late-night gist, emergency study sessions, and unplanned adventures. Some friends become your second family; others, surprisingly, start to drift away after a while. It’s normal. It’s human. And it’s not always anyone’s fault.

Let's talk about why some friendships fade while others stand the test of time, and how to manage it all with grace.

1. Different Paths, Different Priorities

At first, it feels like everyone is moving in sync. Same classes, same memes. But as time passes, people discover different interests, passions, and routines.

One friend might join student government, another dives into sports, another gets busy with work or personal goals. Growing apart doesn’t mean the friendship was fake. It just means you’re evolving, and that’s very much healthy.

2. Life Gets Busier (For Everyone)

Second year hits, and suddenly schedules clash. Assignments pile up. Family responsibilities sneak in. It becomes harder to hang out like you used to.

A lack of constant communication doesn’t always equal a lack of love. Sometimes, adulting just gets real.

3. Friendships Require Effort On Both Sides

The friendships that last are the ones where both people make an effort. It’s not about texting every day but about mutual investment.

If you're always the one reaching out, planning hangouts, or checking in, it's okay to step back and see who makes the effort too, after all the phone works both ways. Healthy friendships are two-way streets, not one-way tasks.

4. Values and Energy Matter

As you grow, you become more aware of what you value: honesty, loyalty, respect, kindness. Sometimes, you realize that a friend you once clicked with no longer shares your core values or worse, drains your energy.

Protecting your peace is not being petty. It's maturity.

5. It's Okay to Grieve Fading Friendships

Losing touch with someone you once called “bestie” can sting, even when there’s no drama involved. It’s okay to feel sad, to miss what you had, and to still wish them well. Growth often means letting go with love, not bitterness.

6. Some Friendships Are for a Season, and That’s Beautiful Too

Not every friend is meant to journey with you forever. Some come to teach you lessons, share memories, or support you through a particular phase of life.Temporary friendships can be just as meaningful as lifelong ones.

7. How to Nurture the Ones That Matter

• Check in intentionally; not just when you need something.

• Celebrate their wins; be genuinely happy for them.

• Communicate openly; especially when life gets hectic.

• Forgive small mistakes; nobody’s perfect.

• Make memories; even if it’s just a 5 minutes meet up after class.

Friendships that last don’t happen by accident. They’re built, nurtured, and protected over time.

University is a time of major growth, for you and for your friendships. Some bonds will stretch and strengthen; others will quietly loosen. And that's okay. The real magic is learning to cherish the people who truly “get” you, and gracefully letting go of what no longer fits.

So breathe. Love. Grow.

And remember... the friendships meant for you will never feel forced.